Judging Miss America

I always wanted to be a judge for the Miss America pageant. Because of my work with the USO, I did get invited to be a judge at one of the preliminary pageants in Maryland. There were two guy judges...and six women judges. They instructed us very carefully that Miss America is not a beauty contest (what???)...it's a scholarship program with the victor being the best all-around young woman. I whispered to the other guy who was a judge and said, "I don't know about you, but I've voting for the one with the biggest hooters." He said, "Me, too!" I told him that's probably why they had so many women judges. They all voted for the opera singer and she won. Of course breathing in and out deeply so you can sing opera develops fairly sizeable hooters, too, so in a way the two guys won as well.